Thursday, February 03, 2005

How to Tell If Your Husband Is Cheating On You

Suspect that your husband is having an affair? How to look for clues to confirm your suspicion? Where to start looking and what are the tell tale signs to look out for? Perhaps the most noticeable one is the very thing that arouses your suspicions - A change in his routine or behavior towards you.

Even though there is no fix pattern of change but sooner or later, you’ll pick up on the subtle changes in behavior and routine. No matter how discreet a cheating husband tries to be, there are always noticeable changes in him as his life is experiencing a change. A new lover is a major change that doesn’t go unnoticed for long!

The most obvious giveaway signs are usually the sudden onset of working overtime and emergency meetings; overtime that never show up on his pay cheque. And how absolutely agreeable he is even after a long day at work… These are usually the first signs that will raise an alarm for you! How do you go about confirming your nagging suspicion? Start with the obvious, check his car and see if you can find strands of hair that sure as hell don’t belong to you. I mean if you sport a short hair cut and is brown haired and you find a strand of long jet black hair, how in the world can that hair belong to you, right?

Next check his shirt for lipstick stain and see if he comes home with faint smell of unfamiliar perfume! To top that off, if there is sudden influx of business trips and he starts saying he’s had a long day and is very tired when you want to talk or when he evades from directly answering your questions, chances are you were right in sensing that your husband is indeed cheating on you.

Frequent call on his cell in which the caller hangs up when you answer is bad news. Something is definitely amiss if he starts disappearing into the next room after picking up late night calls, and when you walk in, he’s talking on the phone with a slow tone with a silly smile plastered on his face. Another dead giveaway sign is his sudden obsession with the computer after you have gone to bed. Check his email… An empty Inbox smells fishy and just reinforce the fact that he has something to hide.

If your Mr Sloppy dresser suddenly develops an obsession with his appearance and you find a shirt or a tie that you did not buy for him. Honey, if you are on the pill, and he’s carrying a condom and you find unexplained scratches or bruises on him you can bet your last dollar that he is definitely cheating on you. A cheating husband normally feels guilt therefore it is likely that he will be less comfortable around you and would probably avoid sex altogether. Either that or your man who is not sexually adventurous suddenly becomes very eager to try out new positions.

There you have it… the list of things to look out for if you suspect that your husband has cheated on you. The change in behavior may be gradual and subtle that it takes you a while to realize what is happening. Not all cheating husbands have affair, some could just be an ONS. Early detection could help salvage your relationship, so it pays to be more attentive.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Extramarital Affairs – Is this something “New”?

Living in the 21st century with the world changing at the blink of an eye and things moving at such a rapid pace, it’s no wonder that extramarital affairs are also on the rise. However is extramarital affair a new age problem or has it existed since the start of civilization.

Let’s take a trip back in time… it has been documented in history that in the early days of living in tribes or clans, there exist a certain ceremony to mark the union of two opposite sex partners. This is proof that ever since humans started living in structured society, we have subscribed to the belief that the union of two people of the opposite sex is the best way to build a family, raise kids, protect from threat and provide food and shelter.

Thru time, societies evolved and within each culture, the marriage bond took on an increased significance. Although different societies depict this union differently, the one thing that they share in common across cross cultural bond is monogamy. Monogamy, the universally accepted fact of a marriage union! Yet despite the inclination towards marriage and the fact that marriage partners have to remain monogamous, people have been indulging in non-monogamous activities throughout history.

Perhaps the most evident historic evidence that extramarital affairs have existed for a long, long time is the inclusion of extramarital affairs as a sin in the Ten Commandments. Extramarital affairs are frown upon by society and religion. It has been ingrained in us since childhood that affairs are wrong. And yet, extramarital affairs still persists thru time and have proven to be an occurrence that we have to deal with.

Stories of sordid affairs have many a times dominated the news headlines. Indiscretion of the rich and famous often hogged the limelight throughout history. Suffice to say that extramarital affairs are not “new” problems but is something that has existed since the start of civilization. The difference lies in the way the affairs are being sensationalized for public consumption and the fact that with the internet, news travel faster and further may give the impression that the people of today are more promiscuous than their forefathers.

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